She don't know she's beautiful

 (Photo credit: TipsTimesAdmin)

Have you ever had someone say something to you that made you question their motivation? I'm not talking so called friends who make a snide remark, I'm talking family or loved ones who you know genuinely care who say things that make you wonder if the words sound as harsh to them as they do to you.

For instance, my late grandparents loved me, of this there is no doubt. They were wonderful, amazing people. My grandfather told me from a fairly young age how beautiful I would be if I would just lose a little weight. My grandmother would let it slip now and then that I would be able to buy much cuter clothes if I were only slimmer. These were comments I remember starting in elementary school. Though I don't recall how I handled them as a younger child, I know by high school I pretended none of it bothered me while silently struggling with an eating disorder. No, I'm not blaming my beloved grandparents for my messed up thoughts on food and weight. I think their words were meant to help and there was absolutely no intention of hurt behind them. But, you take being told you need to lose weight from around eight years old, throw in society's definition of beauty, mix in what media tells us, and it's a recipe for disaster. I am not the only person who has dealt with negative self image, body image issues, and all the other inner turmoil the aforementioned recipe can bring on. As a result, to this day I think I have one set of grandparents who never thought I was beautiful and the other set never made me feel anything other than that. I'm sitting here all teary over that fact because I loved my late grandparents so much and because I am so incredibly thankful that Nanny and Pop never made me feel like my weight was an issue to them. 

Okay, I swear I have a point here. Little Miss is going to be a freshman in high school this year. She is already nervous and dealing with body image issues as a result of her birth defect. Enter one person's offhand remark about her gaining weight over the summer and we spent the evening discussing diet and exercise.  High school is hard enough without well meaning adults adding fuel to the fire. She's 14, I don't want her on a diet. I tried every fad diet I could find in my jr. high and high school years. We discussed making smart choices, limiting sugar, cutting out sodas, and upping physical activity, all I feel are smart for anyone when it comes to food. It's something I feel we will be discussing a lot in the near future. Sure, I want her healthy, but we are not discussing an obese child here. I also want her comfortable in her own skin and to know that she is beautiful, because she truly is. Her heart, mind, soul, everything that she is makes up one stunning young woman.

I look back on high school and think I'd give anything to be that size again. No, I wasn't stick thin, but I was the same size as Marilyn Monroe and at 35 that sounds pretty darn good! Now my thoughts are just all over. My initial feeling when I started typing was to remind us all just how powerful words are and how they stick with us. I was also all fired up about self esteem and body image, which I still am. I guess I just have questions to. How do I encourage these things while helping her meet whatever goals she has for her weight? Losing a few pounds is her idea and it's nothing I will ever push, but at the same time I don't want her to end up like me, wishing I had gotten in shape 20 years ago. Also, when these little remarks are made, do we let them go or speak up? This is something I'm not sure of. 

Teenage girls... I wish I had instructions. OR maybe I need them for life in general. All I know is it comes down to this for me; my daughter is beautiful. And something I've learned is you can be overweight, grey haired, and nearly toothless and still be beautiful. The wrappings concern me little no matter who we are discuss, let me see what's inside. That's what makes you beautiful. 

Weight Loss Musings

So, I've been dieting for about two weeks now. I had lost 12 pounds, but gained a few back over the weekend. Guess I just have to work harder this week! My pal Lynette is doing this with me. She is doing shots, Alli, and has a Curves membership. I am going the old fashioned route just counting calories. For exercise I am doing the WiiFit and a slew of assorted exercise videos. I have so much weight to lose, it sometimes seems impossible. I am trying to set short term goals and work like crazy to achieve them. I put a weight loss ticker way down at the bottom of the blog , that I plan to update weekly. Maybe sharing this here will help keep me more accountable!

The whole family has gotten in on the healthier eating. I am really quite proud of the kiddos and Dan, they are not screaming for sugar like I thought they'd be. I did splurge and get a variety package of those 100 calorie packs of cookies and stuff. They are great for Dan's lunches and the kids grab one for after school. One of them had Rice Krispie treats in it, which I was super excited about, I love those things! Anyway, over the weekend I went to Dollar General to get more and they didn't have any. Imagine my surprise when the box of regular Rice Krispie treats proudly proclaims they are "still only 90 calories'! What? I paid $1 a box more for the others and got more calories than the normal version! It has made me aware that I really need to read labels!

The hardest part so far has been making myself eat. Yes, you read that right, I don't eat most of the time. Usually breakfast with the girls then nothing until dinner. Well, almost nothing, I actually usually end up cramming junk down around 3, so eating regularly has been a big change. It seems to be working though!

Do y'all have any weight loss tips you want to share with me?

Feeling Great!

I am seriously hooked on Wii Fit. I love the fact that it it good for me and fun. It beats the heck out of exercise videos with perky, perfect women telling me how good I'm doing while I am about to pass out. I have been working out faithfully for two weeks and am already seeing a difference!

I feel better, have more energy, am in a better mood, and have more self confidence! My tummy is no longer sticking out past my boobs! I am so happy! I plan to keep it up because I am a much better mom and wife when I feel this good!

We have all drastically changed our eating habits as well. Dan and I are eating much fewer carbs and sugars and such. I am eating more than I normally did during the day, but it is the right foods rather than the wrong ones. I do not feel all that deprived, although I am sure missing bread. I hope to keep this up so the whole family will be healthier and I will shed some extra pounds. The addition of more fresh vegetables and fruits sure isn't going to hurt any of us.

Are any of y'all trying to get healthier during the summer months? I am hoping this works, because I normally get discouraged with dieting. So far, so good. I'd love to hear what you all are doing to help keep your family in shape!

Slacker Mom Getting Healthy

It is one of those days that I have 4.6 million things to do and not nearly enough time to do them in. Not sleeping well has left me unmotivated to do many of the things I should have done early in the week. I just haven't had the energy or desire, My name is Vanessa and I am a slacker mom. But, we all have off weeks, right?

One thing I am very proud of is the fact that I have worked out everyday this week. This is probably not a big deal to some people, but when you are as large as I am, it's a big accomplishment. I am very proud of myself! I will keep this exercise routine up! I do not like exercise, but I like obesity even less.

High on my to do list today is doing the meal plan for this month, or at least the next two weeks. The next logical step in trying to get healthy is to change the way we eat. The whole family needs serious help in the diet department. I figure if we all change the way we are eating, then I won't feel so deprived. Plus, we will all be healthier and maybe Dan will even manage to lose a few pounds. I see nothing but good coming from this. The only problem I know I'll have is from me and Dan with sugar cravings. So, I am trying to figure out what to do about that. There has to be something healthy, yet yummy to take the place of our night time sugar binges.

What are your favorite healthy sweets? Fruit cups, dessert flavored yogurt, or what? I'd love to hear what satisfies your sweet tooth without hurting your waistline!

I Need To Lose Some Pounds

My grandmother and I have recently been talking about whether or not I should start using diet pills in an effort to lose weight. She seems to think it's a great idea, but I was initially on the fence about it. I have researched several varieties and am currently leaning toward Clinicallix. It appeals to me because of the way it's three compounds work together. One expands in your stomach, filling it with soluble fiber to suppress your appetite. The next compound helps you to feel full for a longer period of time. The third compound increases fat burning, boost your serotonin, and lowers your cholesterol. I really like this idea! Plus, you get a huge bottle of 300 pills, so it is affordable. I really think that if I do decide to go ahead and try diet pills, Clinicallix will be the first one I try. Everything I've read about it sounds terrific! If diet pills are something you've been interested in, you might want to check it out!


SAVING is good.